Amethyst Sunday Morning

Amethyst Sunday Morning sounded like an odd name for an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting when I first headed over there as part of my psych rotation, but it turned out to be nearly the exact opposite from what I expected. I remember a character in this one movie I saw who compared AA to being forced to go to church when you don’t believe in God. I presumed it to be slow and painfully tedious, filled with sad, depressing people talking about their sad, depressing lives. But instead it’s an open, warm, and welcoming place of friends. It’s full of fun people who tell their stories and share in the triumphs and failures. As I sat there listening, I realized how universal the themes were. Nobody is perfect, and we all make mistakes and fall short of our ideals. Some people turn to alcohol, some people turn to work, and some people turn to religion, but it seems like we all have to find strength somewhere to help us with the challenges we face in life.

AA starts with one person telling their story for 30 minutes. This is called a “lead,” a way to get the conversation going, but it sounds much more like a testimonial at a baptism. A coffee break ensues, followed by 45 minutes of comments. The comments are supposed to relate to the lead (what they found interesting, congratulating them on their sobriety, or giving them advice for some difficult times ahead), but most of the time they were only tangentially related, if at all. I think most people just want to tell their own mini-stories, and AA provides a safe forum in which to do that. (And yes, people do introduce themselves as “I’m John and I’m an alcoholic,” to which everyone replies, “Hi, John!”) The meeting closes with everybody holding hands and reciting The Lord’s Prayer.

I found a few things about the experience fascinating. First, almost everybody had a coffee drink in their hand or on the table in front of them. It might have been because it was an early Sunday morning, but I think it’s because these people feel stronger and more resilient every time they drink something that is not alcohol. Second, there was a common thread of people turning to alcohol because of feeling left out and/or not fitting in, especially in military families who move around every few years. Third, and most interesting to me, is that they describe alcohol as a friend, someone who understands them and makes them happy. They described it as a love affair with Jim Bean. One person went so far as to compare it to domestic violence, where alcohol would keep knocking you down and you would keep coming back like a battered woman to the abusive relationship. Fourth, alcoholism does not discriminate. There are people of every age, of every gender, and of every ethnicity who have all fallen victim to the siren call of alcohol but have found their bearing again. Fifth, alcoholism is a lifelong disease, similar to diabetes. These people don’t say that they used to be an alcoholic; they still are alcoholics, even though they’ve been sober for 20-30 years. They’re still dealing with their disease, in much the same way a diabetic will always be fighting off diabetes. They’ve just been lucky not to have a relapse in a long time. Sixth, these people treat the program as their religion and apply the principles of the program to every aspect of their life, not just alcohol. They speak of AA’s co-founder Bill’s story similar to gospel (and some even know exactly how many pages certain passages are). The period where Bill faced a multitude of difficulties trying to quit before finally re-emerging a new man sounded strikingly similar to the temptations that Jesus faced before being crucified and coming back to life.

I can imagine AA—like church—to be terrible if it’s forced upon you, but one of the requirements to beginning the program is that you have to be willing to stop drinking. I think that’s essential. You absolutely cannot prescribe AA to someone if they don’t want to quit, because it will be wholly and utterly ineffective.

And I did find out why it was called Amethyst Sunday Morning. Amethyst literally means “not drunken” (think of a- as not and methy- as alcohol) and comes from Greek legend where Bacchus, the god of wine and revelry, got so drunk he was about to harm someone he loved. She was protected by an amethyst gem and Bacchus saw the errors of his drunken ways. It may be an odd name for an AA meeting, but it’s certainly appropriate. I was recommended to hear the stories being shared at another meeting called The Mustard Seed. I can’t wait to find out how it got that name.